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Hi Neil
Sorry to hear your not well .I wouldnt worry about impressions with Larry. You cant help it
if your not feeling well .Sometimes it just takes a little time to get things started . Of
course we wont talk about anything heavy tomorrow. im glad I got to write what i did about
Carol .Did you notice I didnt say the same thing 20 different ways ..lol..
I was trying to come up with some scenarios about you blaming your parents for your actions.I
think i came up with some when we talked about it a while ago. Realistically your defense
wouldnt work in a court of law. If you abuse someone and then dont take responsibility because
your logic is if they remembered to get sunscreen it wouldnt have happened .Or if your parents
didnt go away for the weekend it wouldnt of happened just wouldnt work .Our jails would be empty
and there would be kaos on the streets if you could use this logic for a defense.However Carol
not letting you use the phone is a violation of human rights. If she would have charged you with
abuse you might have used that for a defense.
One could say that you not being able to be left alone was a problem. If you say Carol is
like your family why did you tell her you wanted to phone your parents to come home early. If
she was like family the 2 of you could have come up with a solution to any problems without your
parents. Your real family is there for you but youve chosen to close the door on a lot of
them.However i believe they would be very happy if you decided to let them into your life again.
Unlike Carol who doesnt want to be a part of your life.She doesnt understand how important it
would have been for her to tell you how she feels. It leaves you guessing and hopeful. How would
you feel if she told you she didnt want to work with you or socialise with you ever again. I
think you would have to find closure if she did. I think you will avoid that at all costs .Thats
probably why you dont contact her.
Neil your a great guy . I feel for you when you talk about getting back together with
Carol.If I could wave a magic wand and make it all better I would. Time isnt making it any
easier . To find closure you could write to her and see what comes of it. If not nothing will
change. I hope this heavy email isnt to much with your cold..dont wory about responding...take
your time...ièd rather email about than talk in person sometimes because things are clearer...i
think...cheers...j
----- Original Message -----
From: Neil McRae
Date: Wednesday, March 25, 2009 4:09 pm
Subject: I'm sick again
To: bubzulu@shaw.ca
> John,
>
>
>
> My cold came back so I had to cancel yesterday's visit with
> Larry. I wasn't
> coughing too much, this time I had more of a sniffly/pluuged up
> nose. And I
> had a few nosebleeds when my nose was running.
>
>
>
> My mom tried calling Larry's home phone number all morning
> yesterday but
> there was no answer so she had to talk to him at the door when
> he came at
> 1PM. And Larry said when my mom talked to him at the door that
> he might be
> getting his own cell phone sometime soon so this shouldn't be a
> problemagain. Remember that he shares one with his wife right
> now and she has it
> most of the time.
>
>
>
> What kind of an impression do you think I'm making on Larry
> after we had
> only one regular session just me and him and first I have to
> cancel because
> that was when I was sick (this coincidently happened at the same
> time when
> the ministry cancelled his contract with me). He stopped in the
> next week
> (on Monday afternoon) when I was feeling better, but he only
> stayed for a
> few minutes because he got eassigned for Mondays and had to
> change my
> sessions with him to Tuesdays. And then the next week (which
> would be this
> week), I was sick again. That's three weeks without having a
> full session
> just me and him.
>
>
>
> I got your message that you sent me from Dianne's E-mail address
> titled"thoughts r us" and I'll try to have a written response
> for you sometime
> this weekend about what I think. Please don't start a heavy
> conversationtomorrow. I should hopefully be on for our visit, we
> will try to give you a
> call if I'm not. And I'm not sure if I will feel up to doing the
> fish run
> with my dad on Saturday, we might do that another weekend.
>
>
>
> -Neil
>
>
>
> P.S. Larry finally sent me an E-mail. Here is what he had to say:
>
>
>
> Wonderful dogs! Great life story in photos! It also shows how
> perceptionscan change over time. When you are the age you used
> to think is old you view
> life a bit differently and learn to adapt and grow.
>
>
>
> The way the photos show the change in relationship of the dogs
> over time and
> the way we visualize and perceive those changes made me think of this
> article:
>
>
>
>
>
>
>
> Larry
>
>
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